PTHS: When Family is an Obligation/ Living Alone

Part Time Hustle Struggles: So my mom has been staying with me going on 4 months now. 😐 Regardless of how I feel about the details of it all, family is a priority and my mom needs my help right now and this is how I can help her.

As of last Thursday, my sister has been staying with me as well. 😶 A decision I had no part in. My sister goes to school in New Jersey and when my mom moved in with me, she didn’t tell my sister about her ordeal hoping she’d find a job and secure another place to live before my sister finished school for the school year and headed home for the summer. Needless to say, my mom withheld that information from my sister till the top of June after having several conversations with my sister about how excited she was to come back home.

But my sister no longer had a home. After the semester ended in May, my sister was staying with her dad who also lives in New Jersey and formerly worked at the university she is attending. Rather than have my sister just make this one sacrifice and stay with her dad this summer this one time, my mom scramble up some extra cash and help my sister buy a plane ticket to come “home” to Los Angeles for summer.

I found this out the Tuesday before she flew in. That Thursday. Yeah… a week ago. 😑 So, in less than a week’s time, I’ve been sharing my average studio size apartment with both my mom and my sister.

No personal space. No working space. I find myself staying later at work — a place I don’t like — to avoid coming home because it forces me to put on this face like everything is okay and it isn’t.

And I feel bad that I feel this way. I feel bad for wanting my space and wanting my time, the room to think and carry on long conversations by myself to myself. I miss being able to just wear a tshirt and panties at my leisure. I miss having my company over. I miss being able to talk freely on the phone about anything.

I don’t even have kids of my own and family has become such a huge obligation that I never planned for.

I feel like I now gotta find time at work to work on my own work. How am I suppose find the momentum, the motivation here, when I can’t even stretch my legs?

I miss living alone.

Side Hustlin’ Sunday: Photographer

I think this is a side hustle I’ve been a little leery about sharing, not because I don’t believe it can’t be a lucrative side hustle, but because the market is so heavily saturated. I mean, I can think of five people I know personally who are self proclaimed photographers, regardless of how successful their hustle may be. And I love photography. I love taking pictures, even if it’s on my smartphone. I mean, there are dozens of apps out there dedicated to art of taking pictures.

But when people think of photography as a way to make money, they think photo shops, weddings, big production events because that’s where the money is. But how does one break into an industry where there is so much competition? Look for other niche markets.

Such as…?

Maybe you can be a business photographer. Companies need someone to professionally take of their business location for their website or social media. Or take pictures for a local digital magazine. Or…create your own.

Sites like Foap will pay you for your photos. In other words, in a market so competitive, find opportunities that aren’t. After all, the best side hustles are finding markets whose needs have not been met.

Stay hustlin’!

Professional Development

I am a big believer in professional development. I actually spent of all of 2015 focusing on that, more specifically Marketing. Much to my surprise, my current employer thought nothing of it, but that hasn’t slowed me down one bit!

I’m currently sitting in my Bookkeeping/ Accounting Concepts and Analysis class. This stuff is a bit over my head, but I’m going to stick it out and single hustlin’ female do not give up or given.

The Hustle Doesn’t Care

I had two jobs interviews today for Marketing roles. Still went to work for about 6 hours prior to my interviews. My mom.had my sister flown while she’s on summer break from her first year in college and we are all cozy-ing it up in my studio apartment. Six weeks of the the closest quality family time ever.

And I managed to collect the contact information of six Escrow Officers for my notary business. Because at the end of the day, no matter how wild my home and personal life gets and becomes, the hustle doesn’t care.

The hustle doesn’t care that I’m supporting and trying to be supportive of my mother. The hustle doesn’t care that my sister really needed to come home for the summer even though her home will temporarily have to be my home. The hustle doesn’t care that I have take interviews and leave work early.

The hustle just wants know if I’m still going to push through all this in the midst of these trials and tribulations. The hustle wants to know how bad do I want my dreams and what I’m willing to do for them; what I’m willing to suffer through for them

The hustle just wants to know if I’m stl gonna hustle.

And I am.

PTHS Tuesday: Division, Subtraction and Addition

Part Time Hustle Struggle: Time is the answer and equation involves division, subtraction and addition.

I find that the subtraction and addition become easier to pinpoint when I become more focused, but the division gets a little tricky.

It’s easy to begin to subtract what is not important in my life as I make more and more moves to become career independent and financially free. I know what I want and I direct my energy and my TIME to it. In doing so, I subtract people who fall in one of these categories:

  • Negatively critical – offer nothing constructive, because they have nothing going for them
  • Have nothing going for them altogether – when the goal becomes crystal clear, it becomes a chore to entertain people who aren’t on the same mental wavelength
  • Hot air balloons – people who keep offering their help but never produce any kind. Almost as if they’re waiting for you to achieve it before they believe it
  • Small dreamers – they got dreams but they’re small. And not because they’re potential is small. They just believe they deserve less or “enough”; they believe in false truths
  • Toxic people- the worst. Nothing they say is positive and nothing they do is positive. The world sucks they’re doing nothing about it, it’s not their problem

Subtracting these people is easy. Adding better quality like-minded folks, easy too, but takes time. They have to find you, you have to find them. Work is involved.

But when the clutter is cleared and we’ve aligned ourselves with the right people, dividing our time is the biggest x variable I know. Yes, I believe in doing only what serves me. But that includes maintaining and building relationships. Improving my health and wellness. Increasing my business/ my bottom line. Saving more. Earning more. Making smarter investments. And all they while holding down a full time job. And God forbidden the other life occurrences that love to surprise me.

Hats off to the people who have kids and do this, because I’m still trying to make it work.

I think that the biggest part time hustle struggle is how to best divide your time to live and grow the life you want.

Emma’s Resignation Letter

So…. {laughs}

So… I a friend and I guess I can call her a former co-worker sent in her resignation letter Monday afternoon. I had the chance to read the draft and the final version before she emailed it to our HR department and the COO and owner of the company. And all I gotta say is…. dayum. I mean, I dream of what my last days or weeks of my current job would like but I don’t know if it would ever be something like this:

Hey Everyone,
So I was going to write up this professional ass email but then I just decided to just keep it real. So some of you might know that a couple of months ago in the LA office I had a pretty bad mental break down. Some people may be ashamed or don’t feel ok talking about it, but I am different. I live with extreme anxiety and depression, but this letter is not about that. This letter is about how me having this mental breakdown at work allowed me the time I needed to reflect on not only myself, but the things that were affecting me in a negative manner. One of those things was working at ICT.

Yea, sounds fucked up right? There was so much that I loved about working at ICT. I loved being a part of a company that provides services for children with autism. Despite having to deal with rude parents, schools, BI, PM, or in the odd case CS; I still loved what I was doing. No matter what differences or struggles I also love the team. It didn’t matter if you were in the scheduling department in LA, accounting, or WC. Where the problem laid is in our management and HR department.
Yes, I said it. And it’s true.
You are always saying to come to you if you have any ideas or concerns. Always sending out your surveys and trying to figure us out with data. Even though I am not there in person here it goes. The first time I was effected in a negative manner by management and HR was when they sat me down and wanted to talk about how they thought I wasn’t doing so great in my department. I get it, sometimes these conversations need to happen. Usually after that type of conversation I would think that management would give their employee a plan to work on and then touch bases in a few months to see how you were doing. Did that happen for me you ask? NOPE. Instead I was told by not only my manager Teresa Solis but also HR VP Janet Brown that “Noni doesn’t care if you have kids.” Tell me, how in any way does this comment help their employee succeed? That comment has stuck with me the whole almost four years I have been with this company. I am not perfect in any way, but one thing I know is that I am a hardworking dedicated employee. All I have ever worked on I do it with pride. I think only once or twice in the four years I worked for ICT was I ever acknowledged by my supervisor for all the hard work and amount of work I have done. I can sit here and go on and on about this, but I am not going to. A lot of focus goes to the clinical staff. Yea, they are the ones out on the field but you know what they are not the only ones that matter. The admin matter too! Why don’t we get the same benefits? The same allowance to be taken out to be shown we are appreciated? What, because we are all replaceable? Believe me, I have also been told by management. Why is it so hard to actually value your admin? Why do you think that most people in the office don’t speak up truthfully unless it is done anonymously. Because we know that if anything negative is said this will be taken out on us some way. When management can’t be trusted as well as not being able to trust HR how is anyone going to feel comfortable reaching out to make our work environment more constructive? Oh, and then there was that time when all of scheduling in LA was put into Janet’s old office and were told to stop talking to each other about what we are paid…that was fun. Every time our department was pulled into a meeting there was an unsettling feeling over the department that I am sure I am not the only one that felt it. Another fun flash back, when HR Janet and (I really don’t remember why she was employed by ICT) Julie told the scheduling department that if we didn’t like our jobs to leave…Classic.
Oh another scheduling department favorite in which I am very sure I am not the only one that had this encounter. When your supervisor Teresa tells you that she has eyes and ears everywhere when she is not in the office. How is this ok? Why do you feel you need to big brother your department? How about instead worrying about what is being said in the office worry about being a more effective and professional supervisor. Stop telling the department that things are changing for the better and then nothing changes. For example our yearly performance reviews. What ever happened to that? The first time I was reviewed the first thing that was said to me was that there was no raise with that review. Then the following review when “things were going to change” we were told we would be having yearly reviews. This review should have taken place in February. Oh, and then waiting over two years for any type of raise I was given a slap in the face with what I was given. But when my help was needed when my department was short a Caseload planner, or when help was needed with SAC when what’s her face that was hired as a Caseload planner was not doing her job, and then help was needed in the OC and I was told I would be assisting I did this without hesitation. But of course that was overseen right? And the fact that I am the only senior scheduler that was never offered a caseload planning position despite me openly speaking to my supervisor regarding this matter. But when it was to management’s benefit to throw in my face that I am a senior scheduler that was only time that mattered. Well that was a bad move on managements part. You can sit there and hire others with so called experience but none of that experience can prepare these people for the way they will be treated in ICT. Why do you think there is such a high turnover rate now in our department? Oh yea, and stop lying about working on our department budget to help benefit us. We all know that shit isn’t going to happen. So that is enough rambling from me, believe me I could go on and on. I hope this information is helpful and helps open up the conversation about how the admin staff is treated, how there should be changes made in management, and why HR isn’t more neutral and professional about how they approach department issues.

Shout out to the accounting department. You guys work hard AF too. Love you guys.
It is not healthy for me to return to this toxic work environment. I have worked on helping myself to much to return to what I know is never going to change. That is like getting back with a boyfriend / girlfriend that you know you have a fucked up relationship with. You can try and lie to yourself that this next time will be different, but deep down you know you are lying to yourself.
So with that said.

This is a cat…

A Screaming Cat and Flying Buckets! Whoo hoo!!

And this is also my resignation effective immediately.

Bye Felicia.

Love, Emma

Yes. She wrote all that and yes, this heifa had the audacity to include a cat picture in her resignation letter.

I shared this with my mother and my mother was displeased hearing this, but — hey, I’m all for people burning whatever bridges they wish. I get it. When you have that much animosity for a company has professionally done you wrong for years, sometimes you gotta vent.

Would you ever share/say this to a employer you couldn’t wait to leave?